Womanhood

Quarter of a century…

At my 25th bday shindig..

As we ushered in the new year, I also welcomed in the 25th year of my life. A noteworthy age by all standards and a landmark birthday in every respect- I had officially hit that pivotal age that had been the victim of many a conversations with friends both old and new… and whilst I didn’t physically feel different (aside from cutting my hair, I haven’t changed very much- I can still fit into my trousers from Year 9 and still pretty much play with my nephews for hours on end without feeling worn out…note to self: I should have been a runner in another life…) it was like certain people around me had somehow noted the stark difference for me; I had automatically been enrolled into the ‘School of Womanhood’ where you are expected to put away childish things and begin to make some key, strategic decisions that would have a massive bearing on how the next few years of your life would pan out. And if I didn’t already know that I had hit 25, I was given a constant reminder of the things that I would be expected to do now that I had hit 25…the curriculum had been set and the agenda pre-determined:

  • If you are not engaged or on course to get married then you really ought to think about what you intend to do about it as soon as possible because time is ticking..
  • Don’t worry about your career because these things don’t need to be in place before you get married
  • Don’t appear as a liability because no man likes that
  • Don’t appear needy for reasons as above
  • Make yourself more visible in church or my personal favourite- more ‘findable’ so that your ‘Boaz’ can spot you quite easily
  • Act like a lady, think like a man (the  title of the book that recently became every woman’s bible for reasons I know not)

And whilst I welcomed the timely advice as some of it has some genuine usefulness; by and large, I just didn’t see what the big deal was!! It is actually not that deep!! Perhaps I should be a bit more worried but I think that would defeat the whole purpose as to why I am serving a God that hasn’t failed me to date; who has steered the very direction of my life for the past 25 years and has bought opportunities my way in abundance because I trusted him. I think I am doing ok…I haven’t turned out half bad… (some may beg to differ but your opinion is irrelevant)

And although I am a year older and with that wiser and more knowledgeable, a lot of things will remain the same. I refuse to put myself under pressure that has been falsely created and prescribed according to what everyone else thinks. It is time to place a greater emphasis on the things that have weight in the kingdom of heaven (Matt 6:19-21) and on the things that matter personally to ME and no one else. So if you are approaching the age of 25 and are looking forward at the monstrous list of things that you haven’t got in place (fiancé, house bla bla bla)- DON’T. The curriculum is being re-written and its time to retrospectively consider the things that you do have in place and have achieved. You are the only competitor in the race of your life so there is no need to keep up with anyone else (quote: Pastor Sola; 2012- love it) instead set your own agenda and enjoy NOW; after all, you only turn a quarter of a century but once… 😉

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83 thoughts on “Quarter of a century…

  1. Kofo says:

    So proud of you Ola! I know you are doing great things and God is taking you unto new heights.

    Look forward to the blog becoming my new weekly “must read” addiction.

    Love you lots
    Kofo xx

  2. dupe says:

    Well, first and foremost I have to congratulate you on the BIG 25! Yes it is a landmark age, but life is really what you make it (so I think),

    People will always comment, hint, suggests and give their opinion and YES there is “wisdom in a multitude of counsellors” but choose the counsellors wisely! One thing I have realised in my short number of years is that unless YOU do what YOU’RE advising/suggesting then I won’t listen. There is definitely proof in the pudding/fruit.

    Ola, its so true what Pastor Sola said, and I am soooo motivated by this, we (or maybe just me) are so prone to look at who’s doing what on our left and who’s got what on our right that we MISS what is ahead of us. The plan God has for U is for U. Set your eyes like flint my dear (now I sound old…lol).

    Come husband or children (which I am all FOR!) I however don’t think it should define who YOU are (my opinion). So enjoy the next 25 years as it unfolds, keep your ear soooo close to the heartbeat of the Father and your heart tender! I am sooo proud of you Ola! Sooooo proud of ya! Here’s to the jokes, banter (no more tears!) and to aggressively pursuing Christ!

    Your life Is a Testimony!

    D
    Xx

    • Thanks for the congrats my sister! Happy to have reached it and grateful to God for what he is yet to do..

      You spoke some truth here D and yep trust me only going to take counsel from wise counsellors..

      Thanks hun! I really appreciate it and loving the statement- ‘aggressively pursuing Christ with passion!!’ Its the way forward!!

      Love you loads.
      xxx

  3. This is very well written Ola, soo exciting, can’t wait to read the next one, bt yea for real time is ticking, where is ur ozband men lol :p xx

  4. Mary-anne says:

    This is such a beautiful passage of text…as well as being well written and comical it is most certainly inspiring. I am so glad you have decided to share this. Its funny how the preconceived notions you mentioned in regards to the expectations that others have placed upon you and many other young women when you reach a particular age, have such a direct impact on our daily lives (Pressure x10). You would think as you increased in age and acquired more knowledge, transforming into a woman would be just a little easier. Clearly this is not the case, but as you stated we need to set our own agendas.

    Once again thank you for sharing this, I cant wait to see what you write next.

    Ps: you look lovely in that pic 😉
    xxx

    • Thanks Mary; I really appreciate it trust me…

      And we thank God Mary; I am so glad you benefited from this as well as this was something very heavy on my heart that I felt like I had to get out!

      No worries- and yes I will defoes be sharing something new on Friday by God’s grace..

      hehehe thank you hun ;-)))

  5. michaella says:

    Im 25 in April and boy oh boy do I so know what you mean when you talk about the societal pressures that us young women are under.

    Nice to know I am not aloneeee and everything will come when its time for it to come..

    xx

    • Ola says:

      Nope you are most certainly not alone Michella! Don’t give in to the pressure!

      Thanks for reading the post; it’s very much appreciated. Xxx

    • You are sooo not alone Michaella lol and don’t ever give into the pressure. Look upwards only and drown out the voices horizontally!

      Thanks for taking the time to read it too; very much appreciated.

      And I welcome you into the fold of ’25 year olds’ in advance ;-))

      xx

  6. Charmaine says:

    Ola I’m so proud of you, I don’t read many blogs but I will be reading this one as it will be just like hearing your words of wisdom back in the ‘the Oasis Days’!! Congratulations at the achievements you’ve had so far and I know when I approach my 25th next year I will be referring to this entry everyday so I keep my cool! Love ya loads xXx

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